Timing and Walking down the aisle

When I talk to people about walking down the aisle, a lot of questions come to mind. How long it is going to take? How quickly should I walk? Do we wait for the first bridesmaid to get to the ceremony spot before the next bridesmaid starts to walk? Should we fade out the music at the end, when everyone is in place? Should we have a different song for the bridesmaids? What if the part of the song I want to walk down to starts at 1 minute 15 seconds?

As far as my job is concerned this is one of the most talked about parts of the day. Have a good think about this and imagine how you want it to be and do just that. This is one of the perfect reasons to have a wedding rehearsal. (Read my blog here about 6 Reasons to have a Wedding Rehearsal)  Don’t worry about tradition or what you’ve seen at some other weddings, unless of course you loved what they did and want to do something similar. Simply do whatever you like. It’s your day, people are there to see you exchange your vows, and they can wait if they need to. What’s 2 minutes? Some of the loveliest entrances at weddings are when the guests have had to wait.

Holly and Simon chose to have Perth by Bon Iver playing as Holly entered the Hall. When we were having  the rehearsal, we all discussed that the song has a full minute of intro before the lyrics really kick in, and that is what Holly wanted to enter to. We decided that 1 minute isn’t a lot for people to wait. Walk in when you want. People can wait, they are there for your day, no other reason. You might as well have what you want.
Sean and Chloe had the Imperial March from Star Wars as they entered the stage in their theatre venue. Chloe didn’t want to walk down the aisle and this suited not only the venue, but them as a couple and what they are interested in.
Mel and Cat had the beautiful Day Too Soon, by Sia. They had the music start when the taxi pulled into view. A long song like Day Too Soon is perfect for something like this, it gave them plenty of time to get out of the taxi and then walk down the aisle.  I think it makes such a difference when people have songs with beautiful lyrics that mean a lot to them. It just makes it all the more special.

I have never been to a wedding and heard anyone say that the bride took too long to walk down the aisle or complaints about the song that was chosen. This is something that should mean something to the couple. Some couples choose to have their attendants walk in to a different song than the bride, especially when the groom has a song that he has always imagined the bride walking in to. It sometimes doesn’t ‘fit’ if her attendants walk in to that song too. I think that the song the bride walks down the aisle to is like the soundtrack for that part of the wedding. It tells a small part of the couple’s story if the song is important to them. It can create a huge amount of emotion, not just for the groom but for a number of the guests too.
Have you been to a wedding that was especially moving when the Bride entered because of the music? Or a wedding where the song choice left a lot to be desired? I’d love to hear about it.

Thank you to Love Journal Photography for the stunning images on the blog this week. See more of their work at by visiting their website or you can see what they are up to on facebook.

 

Alison and Geoff

Geoff and Alison met one another about 3 years ago. When they met they instantly hit it off. They spent their first date having dinner together and they had no trouble with conversation. They could have talked all night and they were actually asked to leave when the restaurant was closing.

Their first impressions of each other proved to be quite true. Geoff remembers that Alison had lots of stories to tell and was full of life. He loved her bubbly personality and thoughtful and caring ways. Alison thought Geoff was handsome and as they talked more she realised that he was a true gentleman. It didn’t take long for them to realise that this was love and only a few months into their relationship they knew that this was the real thing. Both Geoff and Alison realised that they had found exactly what they had been looking for.

Alison and Geoff had there wedding at the amazing Immerse Winery in Dixon’s Creek. It was a wonderful day. The sun was shining and it was a stunning October day.  They had their ceremony in the chapel there. It is a gorgeous chapel, with beautiful exposed wooden roof and it had been beautifully decorated. There was lovely fresh rose petals down either side of the aisle. It was small enough and (obviously intentionally) set out in a way that the intimate wedding made the chapel look quite full.

Family is really important to Alison and Geoff and it is something that we spoke about often when planning the wedding. I know that family means the world to them and they would do anything to help them out.  I was lucky enough to conduct the wedding of Alison’s son Paul, about a month earlier. (read all about Kate and Paul’s great wedding here)  So I really got to know them all when getting organised for both of the weddings.

Alison had all of her 3 sons arrive at the chapel with her. She had 2 of her sons enter with her daughters in law, and then she had her eldest son and her Dad both walk her down the aisle. All of the sons, and her Dad, shook hands with Geoff at the front of the chapel to welcome him into the family. I thought that this was a beautiful way to have all of your children involved in the wedding and to also have them welcome Geoff into the family and show their support for their Mum on her special day.

One thing that I really admire about Alison and Geoff is the way that they are both honest about where they have come from. That they can celebrate all the things that life has brought them, and realise that it has made them the people that they are today. They both know that they are not perfect and that their partner isn’t perfect, but they love each other, accept each other, and really want the other to be the best person that they can be.

I had a truly lovely time getting to know Ali and Geoff, and meeting their friends and family, some of them on a few occasions. I am so lucky to get to meet wonderful people and get to spend, in some cases, quite a bit of time getting to know them.  It is great for me when I can realise what their core values are and the things that they hold in the highest regard. I endeavour to make these things obvious in their ceremony so that hopefully all of their family and friends on the day can see that their wedding was really ‘them’. It is an honour for me to be a part of the day, to really get to know these amazing people that at the end of my ‘job’ I can easily call a friend.

Your day, your way.

Your wedding day is one of the most beautiful days of your life. You should do it your way. You get to make promises to your favourite person in the world. It shouldn’t be done any other way than the way you want it. Especially with your ceremony.

I know I am a celebrant, and it’s the part of the day that I am involved in, but I think the ceremony is probably the most important bit. Without the ceremony and the promises, it’s just a big (and sometimes very expensive) party. There are people out there that are really concerned about the party and not so much the marriage. Not so much the people that I have married, thank goodness! I don’t know how I would go with that, but I know ‘of’ these people that is for sure.

Some of the loveliest weddings that I have conducted and been to are weddings were people have done it to suit their personalities. They were the perfect wedding for them and if someone else had that wedding it would have been out of place.  These weddings have just been the perfect fit for these people, and that has been what has made them so wonderful.

That is what I aim to help you do, I want to make your wedding represent you. I know I tend to go on a little bit about it, but it really is one of the best days where you have all the people that mean the most to you there. A lot of the time it is costing you a considerable amount of money so you should dream big and have exactly what you want. Talk it over, sit down and write a list of all the things you want on your day and go from there. I’ve spoken before about what you legally need to have in your wedding, and it isn’t really that much, the rest is up to you and your partner.
From a selfish point of view, I don’t want to be conducting weddings that are the same. I love writing a bespoke wedding, (read my blog about Bespoke Weddings here) I like the whole process of getting to know people and creating a ceremony that is uniquely about the people getting married. How boring to be going out and just delivering the same few ceremonies over and over again.  You spend hours getting flowers, a dress, the food and all of these things just as they should be and the ceremony should be the same. Your day, your way.

One of the best parts of my job is when someone that I haven’t met comes up to me after a ceremony and goes out of their way to tell me that it was a beautiful ceremony, that it suited the couple so well. I love that moment. These people don’t have to say nice things to me about the day, they don’t have to speak to me at all if they don’t want to, but it is an amazing moment for me when this happens.
Have you been to a wedding that was just perfection for the couple? Or have you been to the opposite, where it was just like someone had cut and paste where the couples names needed to be?

Thank you to Untamed Images for the use of their photos on this weeks blog. Go onto their facebook page and see all of their latest weddings, and view their website here.

Meet your vendors

This is so important. Meet your vendors. It may sound like common sense or you may think that you can find out everything that you need to know from an email, but I cannot suggest strongly enough to meet the people that are going to be a part of your big day.

Of course send emails, call places and request that people get in touch with you online, but don’t leave it at that to make your decision. I get a lot of people emailing me asking how much I charge for a wedding. Which is fine, by all means get a price range, but why have you contacted me? Did someone recommend me? Did you see me conduct another wedding? did you find me on facebook? this blog? There must be some reason that you have contacted me, doesn’t it make sense not to meet me and see what I can bring to your day. I don’t think you can learn too much about how a person will help you in an email.  I understand that everyone has a budget, but I think that it is vitally important that you are happy with the person that is going to be conducting your wedding. You should feel happy and comfortable with them, and I don’t think you can find that out just by asking “how much do you charge?” in a email.

It is the same with the other aspects of your day. Meet the wedding coordinator at the venues that you like. It can make a huge difference in your day. I’m sure you won’t care if the venue you like is going to be an extra $200 if you have a coordinator that makes you feel good about the way you want your day to run, compared with someone that makes you feel that you have to do things exactly the way that they always do it. I’ve spoken to couples who have chosen their venue and paid, then the coordinator leaves and they are forced to have someone else look after them. It has changed the whole feel of the experience and some have even said that they probably would have not booked the venue if they had have known that the other person would take over.

It’s the same with flowers, your dress, everything. Photography is a great example, no one is going to care if they paid a couple of bucks more as long as they are comfortable with who is taking their photos. It will be obvious in the shots. Sometimes saving $50 is never worth the saving. It costs you more in headaches if there are issues along the way.

Meet with the people that will be involved with your day. How do they make you feel? Do you feel excited about the wedding that you have planned? Comfortable with what they will bring to the table for your day? If yes the they are probably a good fit. If they make you question what you have dreamed for your day, or make you feel not quite right, keep looking. The perfect person for your perfect day is out there.

Thank you again to Love Journal for the photos on the blog this week. Check out their website and facebook page for lots more amazing images.