My Wedding Day

My wedding was on a perfect Saturday in March, in Mildura. We were both young, and I thought I knew more about the world than I did. I knew nothing about weddings, nothing about what you can have and what you can do with weddings. I didn’t realise that we could make it so much more personal than it was. I didn’t know about writing my own vows about music that can be used or about anything except that I wanted to be married.

Looking back now there are things that we would change, but only small things, like music (definitely)  I would probably have a song that meant something to me coming down the aisle, rather than the traditional bridal march, something like Gorcki by Lamb, or Angus and Julia Stone’s, Wedding Song or  Forever by Ben Harper. Just something that said a little more about me and my husband. (some of these weren’t released I know) I would probably have a different hairstyle, and a handful of the guest list would be different, but all things considered it was 13 years ago and no matter when you get married there are little things that I’m sure everyone would want to change about their day.

All of that aside, we had a lovely wedding day. It was in a beautiful church, with all of our family and friends at the time. My step father conducted the ceremony, which was heartfelt and emotional.  My Mum walked me down the aisle, as I felt she should, she was the one that raised me and it just felt right to do. My sister (11 years old at the time) did a lovely reading. We had some of our best friends  (and I’m happy to say people that are still some of our best friends) stand beside us while we became husband and wife. We promised to share our lives together and stand by each other in sickness and health, for better for worse.

We had a beautiful reception at Trentham Estate Winery. We had lovely food and drank great wine with our family and friends. We had a small group of people because at the time the restaurant only held 50 people, we ended up having 46 people there, and even that was quite tricky to make sure that we got around to everyone and had a bit of time with them all.  The weather was perfect for drinking wine on the river. We had our photos done at Trentham Estate too, so that all of the family shots could be done and people could see us having our photos done by the river while they ate canapés.  I have really  fond memories of the day, spending time with people that I loved, in a perfect setting. I remember laying on the grass laughing with friends, feeling the sun on my face watching the river in my wedding dress, running downhill for our infrared wedding photos, sharing our first meal and husband and wife with special friends and family members, some of who are no longer with us, waving at little girls from the wedding car and wearing my wedding dress into Coles.  Yes, I did wear my wedding dress into Coles, I always said that if you spend that much money on a wedding dress you should wear it ALL day, and I made sure that I did that.

Should we have Bonbonnerie?

Many weddings include bonbonnerie gifts including the traditional sugared almonds. On many occasions I remember almonds wrapped in a piece of delicate tulle or lovely sheer fabric. Traditionally, five Jordan almonds were displayed this way to represent fertility, longevity, wealth, health and happiness. The bitterness of the almond and the sweetness of the sugary covering are meant to represent the bitter sweetness of a marriage.

Bonbonnerie is a very old tradition at weddings, although sugared almonds are not that popular these days.  One wedding that I conducted had them given out at the ceremony with the Order of Service booklets, as the mother-of-the-bride wanted them to be part of her daughters day, as it her family’s tradition.  My best friend had them on the tables at her wedding too, but had so many other awesome bonbonnerie gifts I think that a lot of people might not have even noticed them. (see all the amazing bonbonnerie that she had on my blog post about her day here)

Bonbonniere is something that you can make part of the theme of your wedding and it doesn’t have to be expensive, neither is it really a crucial part of the wedding, but can be something you have some fun with.  You could make the gifts yourself, and it can be something that has a double purpose like place settings or table centerpieces. Bonbonnerie can be a great way to let people know more about you. For example, you could bake the bonbonnerie, if you are into baking, or create a little book with your recipes, or give some of your favourite spices if you like to cook or barbecue. If you love nature and bushwalking, gifts such as a seed bomb or some sort of seedlings that your guests can put into their own garden. Think of the things that you love and try to find a way to incorporate it into your bonbonnerie. Are you into Spiderman? Maybe either you or one of your artistic friends could make a comic strip style fridge magnet with you and your partner written into the story. This is another thing where only your imagination can limit you.

Do you really need it? No, no one needs Bonbonnerie. It is something that some people come to expect at weddings, although I am not sure why, there are plenty of things that you are spending money on, but again it can be something that can double as something else. Using them for place tags is a great idea if you are having a seating plan. You could always give them out to your guests when you are leaving for the evening or at the end of your reception to make sure that the guests know that they are for them to take home, not just lovely table decorations, and that way you know you will have said goodbye and thank you for coming to all of your guests.

Will it get left behind? Most of the time at weddings some people will always leave the party favours behind. It is sad to see when couples have spent so much time, money and effort on them. Personally, I love to keep a memento from special occasions – so I love all of the bonbonnerie.

Should I choose food for my bonbonbiere gifts?  Food is always popular, in particular chocolates or personalised lollies. Guest are likely to take it with them, or eat it at the wedding. With food at least you know most of the time it isn’t going to be a huge waste.

Have you been to a wedding recently that had fantastic or not so fantastic bonbonnerie? What do you think about not having bonbonnerie at a wedding?

Thanks so much to Untamed images for the use of their stunning images. Check out their website here.

Lovely wedding invites

I was so excited when I received a wedding invitation in the post a few weeks ago. I love wedding invitations; I love the way you can just tell it’s something special just by the way the envelope feels. I especially like the way that invitations give you a bit of a hint as to what to expect, in relation to the style and theme of the wedding to come.

I was really excited to see this invitation after the lovely ‘save the date’ that I blogged about a few weeks ago for my friends wedding in New Zealand (check out that blog here). When I received the invitation in the mail I knew it would be just as lovely as the ‘save the date’.

I love how cohesive everything is and the way that the couple have included special instructions in regards to the location, directions, background information about the venue and what guests should expect as far as rules.

Have you received any lovely or interesting invitations in the mail lately?

Wedding and Engagement rings

Traditionally, or should I say in the past, the man purchased a ring and then asked the love of his life to marry him –
how things have changed!  Obviously this still happens but it is not always the case. Some people choose to make the decision together and skip the cliché routine.  Sometimes a man chooses to propose with a ‘toy’ ring or no ring at all, and the couple shop for a ring together. This seems to becoming more and more popular amongst couples, especially if the groom to be is apprehensive about choosing the ring that the love of his life will hopefully wear for the rest of her life. The groom to be could be quite attuned to his partners tastes and buy the ring on his own accord. Alternatively the bride to be may leave certain ‘hints’ for her partner – a circled ring in a catalogue etc. It can be quite a task to choose the right ring, with a toy ring symbolising engagement or no ring, the proposal can still be a surprise and your partner can choose an appropriate ring.

Sometimes people want to buy an antique ring or use a past or present family members ring, possibly having it re-modeled. Some couples opt for no engagement ring and get a wedding band, or choose to have one ring that suited to their personal atheistic. If the bride to be doesn’t wear a lot of jewellery, it can be hard to decide on an engagement ring or wedding band they will feel comfortable wearing.

There are no hard and fast rules about rings, especially as a ring isn’t necessary. Some couples choose not to exchange wedding rings in their ceremony at all. Some people exchange rings but do not choose to have any extra wording or promises in the ceremony. I have done a couple of weddings where I simply mention that an exchange will take place and give them a few moments to do so. Alternatively others wish to say a few words to each other about their promise of love and what the rings represent in regards to their relationship.

Whether there is a ring or not does it really matter? What matters is the love that the bride and groom share. The size of the diamond or other precious stones doesn’t compare to the love shared. What I love most about engagement and wedding rings is what they represent – the love that two people share and the desire to be together, through the good and bad that life will bring.

Thanks to Untamed Images for the use of the beautiful images. Check out their website here.